I want to tell you about my first time.
It happened in the lobby of the Myrtle Beach Marriott.
We collapsed into the tasteful British Colonial plantation chairs after too many hours on the road. Myrtle was the tail end of a whirlwind roadtrip through the Carolinas that included Asheville, Raleigh, Durham, 5 kids, 4 adults.
And it was hot.
During a tour of the Duke University campus, we all noted that sweat was emanating from body parts not previously known to be perspiratory-earlobes, heels, elbows. To this day, we refer to purgatory-like weather as “Duke Hot”, as in, “Crank up the a/c. It’s freakin’ Duke Hot in here.”
Back to the lobby. Centrally situated was a substantial mahogany console table. And on that table were clear plastic tumblers and a beverage dispenser. I approached warily, like a desert nomad who fears the oasis is merely a mirage. Slices of lemon danced as strawberries bobbed in the water. I downed one glass. Two. Three. I was immediately rehydrated and renewed.
Now I squeal “Fruity water!” every time I stumble upon a dispenser in a hotel lobby. Even budget chain hotels like the Hampton Inn and Hyatt Place have realized it’s possible to generate guest ecstasy by squeezing some lemons into a water-filled plastic pitcher.
I dug the beverage dispenser out of the basement, sliced up some lemons, opened a bag of frozen strawberries and squealed. I think I’ve got enough lemons to last until Tuesday so let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.